Speechless – Dan + Shay
Main Point: Just like a groom when he sees His bride, believers will be in awe when they see the place God has planned for them to spend forever.
Vital Info Before You Get Started: The following info should help you contextualize this very popular song so you can have a great discussion about it with your kids.
- IMPORTANT NOTE TO PARENTS: We at The Source for Youth Ministry believe that certain elements in our youth culture can serve as good discussion jump starters with students. At the same time, we would never hope to introduce teens to a negative influence that they haven’t already encountered. This balance is a delicate one. In our experience most teens, churched and unchurched, keep pretty current with music and music videos like this one. Thanks to YouTube, MTV.com, Spotify, and iTunes, the most popular music videos and songs are free to access only a click away. If you decide to use this, do so by catering it to fit your family’s needs.
- Hailing from Pennsylvania, Dan Smyers started touring with a band called Transition when he was just fifteen years old. Smyers started attending Carnegie Mellon University to study finance before his life took a different path.
- Smyers his wife Abby Law married in 2017 after meeting four years earlier at an animal rescue center. They now proudly raise three dogs as well as being huge supporters of the Nashville area Proverbs 12:10 Animal Rescue.
- Shay Mooney was raised in Arkansas. After graduating from Union Christian Academy he attended Valley Forge Christian College for only a year before going all-in on his music career.
- After dating country music star Veronica Ballestrini for a few years, Mooney married former Ms. Arkansas Hannah Billingsley in 2017.
- Smyers and Mooney met at a party at Smyer’s Nashville home in 2012. After jamming together for a few hours they knew they had something special and have been writing songs together ever since.
- Don’t appear as if you have a “canned” discussion in your head and rattle off questions like a teacher giving a pop quiz—your kids get enough of that in school. This is a guide, primarily—not a verbatim script. Just familiarize yourself with the content here and start a conversation in the most natural, unforced way you know how.
Introducing the Song – Say Something Like This: Dan + Shay wrote this song after talking about the first time they saw their wives in their wedding dresses and what an incredible moment that was. They wanted to capture the feeling they had when they saw their brides, and the video is actual wedding footage that shows their authentic reactions to seeing their soon to be wives on that day..
The Music Video: The music can be viewed for free at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7UoP9ABJXGE
Song Lyrics – Speechless
You say you’ll be down in 5
The smell of your perfume
Is floating down the stairs
You’re fixing up your hair
Like you do
I know that I’ll be a mess
The second that I see you
You won’t be surprised
It happens every time
It’s nothing new
It’s always on a night like tonight
I thank God you can read my mind
‘Cause when you look at me with those eyes
I’m speechless
Staring at you standing there in that dress
What it’s doing to me ain’t a secret
‘Cause watching you is all that I can do
And I’m speechless
You already know that you’re my weakness
After all this time I’m just as nervous
Every time you walk into the room
I’m speechless
It started when you said, “Hello.”
Just did something to me
And I’ve been in a daze
Ever since the day that we met
You take the breath out of my lungs
Can’t even fight it
And all of the words out of my mouth
Without even trying
And I’m speechless
Staring at you standing there in that dress
What it’s doing to me ain’t a secret
‘Cause watching you is all that I can do
And I’m speechless
You already know that you’re my weakness
After all this time I’m just as nervous
Every time you walk into the room
I’m speechless
It’s always on a night like tonight
I thank God you can read my mind
‘Cause when you look at me with those eyes
I’m speechless
You’re standing there in that dress
And, girl, it ain’t a secret
‘Cause watching you is all that I can do
I’m speechless
You already know that you’re my weakness
After all this time I’m just as nervous
Every time you walk into the room
I’m speechless
Oh, you know it, baby
Three Questions to Ask in the Car (with thoughts to dive deeper with your kids):
Q: What are some things that you’ve seen that have left you speechless?
A: Start the conversation by discovering things that have produced awe in their lives.
Q: What do you think heaven is like?
A: You can discuss their thoughts on heaven and talk about what the Bible actually says about the place where believers will spend eternity.
Q: What do you think it looks like to prepare yourself for heaven?
A: This conversation can be steered to salvation, inward transformation, storing up treasures in heaven and more.
Where to Take It from Here: Wherever it feels natural. If these questions lead to a longer discussion on the topic, wonderful! (There is a guide just after that paragraph that helps you do just that.) If your kids are barely uttering grunts, don’t get discouraged – the next time it feels right, try out another song. Keep engaging them.
For Deeper Discussion:
(If your kids seem into diving in deeper and looking at what the Bible has to say on the subject, the following discussion guide can help take you there.)
Want help getting your teenager engaged in conversation? CLICK HERE for a helpful article from our “Parenting Help” page providing you with 3 Essentials to Talking with Today’s Teens.
Transition Statement – Say Something Like This: What an incredible picture it is to think of their reaction when they first saw their wives on their wedding days. The Bible uses wedding imagery to describe the relationship between Jesus and the church and how believers will respond when they first see heaven. The response to seeing Jesus and the things He does is often speechless. Let’s look at the parallels between what the Bible says and the incredible wedding image painted in this song.
Discussion Questions:
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: For those who have been to weddings, describe a beautiful moment you’ve witnessed at a wedding you attended? (if nobody as a good one, ask about ones they’ve seen in television or movies)
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: Share of a time when you were speechless. This could be when you saw something in nature or when something happened that left you stunned.
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: At one point the song says, “after all this time I’m just as nervous, every time you walk into the room.” Why do you think he feels this way?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: What are some characteristics you would say are non-negotiables for you as you look forward to a future spouse?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: What are some ways you will prepare yourself now for your future wedding and marriage?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: Why do you think God chose to call the Church (body of believers) the bride and Jesus the groom? What is it about this image that you think He wanted to capture?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: What do you understand the brides white wedding dress to represent? Why do you think this is an important part of the wedding day?
Read the following passage:
Revelation 21:2
I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband.
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: First read Ephesians 5:22-33. What do you think God wants us to take from that passage about the parallel between a husband and wife and Jesus and the Church?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: Looking now at Revelation 21:2, why do you think the Bible describes the New Heaven (the place where believers will spend eternity) as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: How long did it take God to create the world? Now read John 14:3. If Jesus said he would go and prepare a place, how long has He been working to prepare the city mentioned in Revelation 21? If He took six days to create this world and thousands of years to create the city – what does that tell you about this city?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: Considering the song we’ve been discussing and the reaction of the grooms to seeing their brides, how do you think believers will react when they see the city God has been working to prepare for them?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: Along those same lines, and considering what we’ve talked about, how do you think Jesus will respond when He sees His church in heaven? (And talk about how amazing that is that He responds with that same awe!)
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: What do all these things we’ve talked about tell you about who God is?
- ASK A FEW FAMILY MEMBERS: How can you make sure you spend eternity in this city with Jesus?
- ASK ALL FAMILY MEMBERS: We’ve talked about ways you’ll prepare yourself for your wedding and future marriage. What are some ways you will prepare yourself for being with Jesus forever and being in this city?
Wrap Up – Say Something Like This: It is just crazy awesome when you consider that those who have placed their faith in Jesus will one day be in a place that will literally leave them speechless. When you consider different encounters in Scripture, this makes sense. The prophet Daniel encountered Jesus before He was born as a baby and the Bible says his reaction was he “bowed with my face toward the ground and was speechless.” (Daniel 10:15). The righteous man Job encountered God and responded saying “I am unworthy—how can I reply to you? I put my hand over my mouth.” (Job 40:4). Even John, when he received the Revelation of Jesus that we read in the Bible met with Jesus and said “When I saw him, I fell at his feet as though dead.” (Revelation 1:17). When you consider these reactions to God, what does it say that this same God has made this verse true for you and I?
“Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16)
Take a moment and consider how incredible this reality is, that this God who makes people speechless has invited you and I to approach Him confidently.
(Pause and give them a quiet moment to pray silently.)
Jesus has died for you and I so that we can connect with this awesome and perfect God despite the reality of our sin. He not only has done this but He is changing us from the inside out so you and I can be ready for that day when He sees us in heaven and He reacts like a groom seeing His bride. As if this isn’t more than enough, Jesus has been working to prepare the place where believers will spend eternity – and that place is so insanely incredible that you and I will literally be speechless when we see it. When you and I live this life with that reality in mind, it changes our perspective on right now – because we realize this is all temporary. Let’s take a few moments and reflect on that with God, and consider how we need to prepare for eternity.
(Pause and give them a few moments to pray silently.)
Just like a groom when he sees His bride, believers will be in awe when they see the place God has planned for them to spend forever. Let’s be people who spend this life preparing ourselves for that encounter. In addition to making sure we will be there, let’s realize this same awesome God wants us to draw near to Him here and now. Imagine how different our lives might be if we engage this God who leaves us speechless and truly believe He is who He says He is. Let’s close our time praying together, asking Him to help us see Him here and now and to prepare us for that moment when we stand speechless before Him.
CLOSE IN PRAYER
Rob Chagdes
Rob Chagdes is one of the pastors at Prairie Lakes Church in northern Iowa. In the years since he met Jesus as a sixteen year old, Rob has spent his life working to raise up the next generation to love God and invite others into His unending story. He spends most of his free time with his wife Leslie, their three amazing daughters, and their energetic dog Jedi. You can reach Rob at chagdeswrites@gmail.com
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